Three poems by C.M. Keehl

loop theory

to carry this blood
continuously trying to
renew reinvent

what I want
always changing

what I am
is what
I am lacking

if there is god
gravity an illustrated
guide for freshness
alchemy for

each moment I am alive

surprises me

before I freeze

I’m in a hotel room & a blizzard
outside my brain
is not what I anticipated
To prepare for worst is only worse
unexpected 11:11
wish for something
to write so I can cheat death
On occasion
I take everything I can handle
adderall drink Too much
wonder if I’ll wake wander mountains
far from home improper attire
Tell my body who’s in charge
of what I’m feeling
a metaphor for risk
Larsen-C predicted
to collapse I face
phantom suffering what’s
obsolete by looking
to the mirror regret
there is so much more To regret
When we are no more
void will go to bed hungry
I have Given my body away
times I do not remember
what was mine From dreams I see
green of other worlds
Haunting memory when I was 7
one hundred million items documented
a comprehensive history
What is worth saving?
Add twenty more years I add to
Anxiety Make a list add
another situation another fear
I’ll never check any
of it off.

decay, everyone

is doing it
everyone is lying
I’m keeping
track of age of time
I feel empty try to fill myself up
le croix in a parking
lot I’m unsure where to go
from here if it’s faux pas
really bad formulaic karma
to wear fake fur or fear or another
man’s history another man
who isn’t my father?
who isn’t further from
truth is we agree to agree
words that shape rot forming
mixed drinks & definitions
I’m full off carcinogens
checking out time
not left at the library
I never said meaning–
less I meant more lust as artifice
as sufficient solution
for silence a unsatisfactory tear
I mean tears I will cry but
won’t tweet about
my beer is another lie
another way I will be
in control bubble gum popping
a guru of no thing no note
before I go full cycle is
I’m chewing off my tongue
it doesn’t hurt
until I swallow.

C.M. Keehl is a poet living in Michigan with her dog. She has a chapbook, UNTIL THE FOXES, with Ghost City Press and is founder of GRAVITON. Recent poems appear or are forthcoming in Powder Keg, FIVE:2:ONE, Souvenir Lit, and elsewhere. She tweets @cmkeehl.